Saat moments (geddit, geddit?)
Not sure if many people know this, but Alfian Saat is actually a student in my school, yes in my school that is WKW SCI, NTU. Anyway I came across his blog (by this time it's too late to say Alfian who? Because shame on you) and he said a few really funny things about SCI. Saw him a few times, he's even in a few of my classes, but what do you say to brilliant people? How to spell Really Long Words?
If all goes well, I'll be in NTU SCI (School of Communication and Information) this August, for an Undergrad and eventually Masters course.
I am so looking forward to being in school again! Here are my resolutions:
1) Buy pencilbox.
2) If taking Drama Minor at NIE, deliberately fail when asked to write essay on Robert Yeo.
3) Tell whoever is conducting CDP202 at NIE that in their survey of 'leading companies' in Singapore theatre, 'Theatre Ox' is a bit out--considering that founder Ang Gey Pin has fled and is now based at the Grotowski Workcentre in Italy and a few remaining members have sort of regrouped under 'In-Source Theatre'. Also, ask whoever is conducting CDP101, 'Who IS Michael Chekov?'
4) Take electives at ADM under Lucy Davis and come to class wearing SIA kebaya.
5) Tell people who don't know better that the WKW in WKWSCI (That's the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information) stands for Wong Kar Wai.
6) For Singapore Studies module, ask tutor whether can pass up 'Homesick' as homework. (Yi-Sheng says it's better read than watched, so pass up script instead of DVD) (I know it's 'hand in' and not 'pass up' but 'pass up' is such an irresistible Singaporeanism!)
7) Scatter lallang seeds on grassy roof of ADM building. Mimosa seeds also--to prevent couples frolicking on roof on Valentine's.
8) Talk to Chinaman/Chinawoman in Malay, smile but say really nasty things like, (to man) 'Do all of you go to the same barber', (to woman) 'Do all of you buy windbreakers from the same shop?'
9) Turn at least one corridor in Hall of Residence into mini nudist colony.
10) March in front of ADM building with fellow SCI students yelling, 'We Rock, You Suck!'
11) Find secret mass grave of communists somewhere on the NTU campus.
12) Reply to person on IRC who types 'anyone in NTU?' When exchanging pics, send photo of Chinaman.
13) Feign ignorance if ever Journalism Faculty Head Cherian George asks, 'Is it true you once sent my wife Zuraidah Ibrahim a one-line email that said, 'You are the new Chua Mui Hoong'?'
14) For Final Year Project, convince a group of people (consisting of folks that you don't like) to produce an ad campaign supporting female circumcision.
15) In wriggling way out of writing Hall Musical, offer instead to give it 'a favourable review' on blog; eg. Two Thumbs Up for "Chinaman of Letters!"
16) Watch NTU dragonboat team train to detox from alarming 9:1 ratio of females to males in SCI.
17) For internship, ask if can do at ISD. When asked why, look incredulous and say, 'But every Straits Times journalist worth his or her salt went there!'
18) For the 'Basic Media Writing in Chinese' module, when asked to write assignments, copy out articles from Lianhe Wanbao and pass up as my own work (My response to essay question 'What Role Does the Internet Play in Challenging The Dominance of Mainstream Media?' will be 'Security Guard Rapes 70-Year-Old Grandmother')
19) Invite Andy Ho to give talk. Introduce him to audience as Andy Ho Mo Phobe. Or Andy Ho Mo Fo.
20) Get Brian, Junfeng, Zihan, Royston, Ash to do my homework. Remember to say pretty please. Oh my. He is funny. And his writing is brilliant. Shit I hope he doesn't Google his name and read this. I'd be afraid.