should've gotten hurt a little bit more.

I remember taking photographs of old friends when we were in secondary school. we looked so happy then, not thinking twice about stripping down to our shorts and blouse to wash classroom walls on Operation Clean Up Day [don't ask. it's actually quite cute.] I was so reckless then, and we used to wear our emotional scars so proudly because they were indications of how tough we were as 15 year olds. I loved all kinds of people, and had so much faith in them. I wasn't afraid of him, of myself. I was as affectionate as I should've been and I used to be so emotionally dependent on my friends. we used to love being chased after by the Discipline Mistress who always, always hounded girls when they didn't wear proper school socks. crushes were common and we fell in and out of love so readily. [or at least, what seemed like love.] but I wasn't afraid because my friends had my back. 'boys come and go, but us girls stick together.'

now that I no longer have these photographs it feels like I've lost all proof to tell others I used to have an awesome teenage life. where I was proud to have been loved by amazing people. when I had everything.

I don't know why I've been so emotional lately. maybe I like reminiscing because I've gotten tired of growing up and making bad memories. I'm sick of learning lessons only adults know about.