rewind

it happened for a reason.
i think maybe he went through all that with me and left so he could be with you and learn something.
i suppose he has changed, and it would be unfair for me to not give him a chance. and that maybe he's realised and saw himself through my eyes.
something ive always been hoping for.
and now that i have that wish fulfilled i dont know where to go.
i look back and maybe im sincerely happy for you now.
but i cant be sure how i'll feel tomorrow.
perhaps back to the old emotions of malice and jealousy.
and that no matter how i want you to regret and be remorseful,
retribution will never fall on you.
and no, i didnt relish those few hours you were actually apart from each other.
in fact i was sorry for you.
to want to promise so much at a time i think you're not ready.
but who am i to say.
then again, you've never earned the right to say all that to her about me.
and even if it were true, you've only yourself to blame.
i didnt choose to hate you; you're just naturally hate-able.
but no matter what happens, noone else will ever come close to you.
and im okay with that. i think?
partly because i cant imagine having someone else out there just waiting for the right moment to hurt me like you did.
and also since you left a burning impression on my black, black heart.
kan special macam gitu.








oh forget it sorry anti-climax im tired and i cant go on.